Thursday, June 21, 2012

Chicken 'n Chips

Ever have one of those days at work when the level of pissed-off ranges from simmer to rolling boil?

Constant interruptions are nothing new but some days are worse than others.  Kate and I always manage to work well together, but sometimes the other combinations of  co-workers doesn't quite...fit. 

Eeyore and Beth are a perfectly bad pair, both being negative, complainers, and glass-half-empty types.

Plus, when they are together they sound like chickens....cluck, cluck, cluck..CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CCCCCCLUUUUUCCKKKKK!!!!!  Complaining about everything and harassing the new housekeeper mostly.  That took up a good bit of their time.

So annoying.  Between the two of them in my right ear, and the mother in the room to my left who insisted on HIGH DECIBEL PARENTING* the kid with an earache I was ready to poke my eyes out.  

Me (quietly, so that only Kate could hear):  shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up.

Kate (moaning): "Oh why won't they shut up??  They are hurting my ears!"

Me: "I am ordering a wood chipper"

Mac: "I don't get it"

Kate: "You know....Fargo?"

Mac: "You mean like North Dakota?"

Me: "You've never seen that movie?  How can that be?"

Mac: "Oh.  Is it any good?"

Kate launches into a synopsis, including the wood chipper scene. "It's pretty funny".

Me: "Heartwarming as hell" 

Mac: "So not a family movie?"

Me: "Depends on your family values"

Yeah it was kind of a wood chipper day.



*High Decibel Parenting consists of a parent who insists on speaking to their child as if they were two rooms away.  This is done for our benefit so that we can hear how what a caring, concerned, enlightened parent they are.