The longer I am away from it, the more clear it becomes that I was drowning in shark infested waters. In a lightning storm. While trying to pull others to safety. As management was yelling at me to do better. While eating my pizza. And throwing rocks.
I don't miss it.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Welcome...
….to your new BWOM locker!
As you can see, the previous occupant has meticulously maintained it. Unless these are gifts.
Inventory includes some journal articles, a jar of peanut butter, and a bra.
My first locker I had to wait for someone to foolishly abandon one without a lock for three days in a row to acquire, after waiting two years for such good fortune.
Maybe they were eaten by pigs, I forget, but I'm sure I don't know who might have put those pigs in the breakroom bathroom.
Since TPTB reassigned lockers by checking the assignment roster about every 7 years, no problem.
But in case the former owner returned, I had to act casual and profess ignorance. Both personal fortes of mine.
So if you're approached at change of shift in days to come by someone a little saggy, with one piece of bare bread, another piece covered with jelly, wondering where she left her clinical project, you know what to do.
If nonchalant ignorance fails, I can get you a deal on some hungry and only slightly used pigs.
Luxury!
ReplyDeleteMy first locker I had to wait for someone to foolishly abandon one without a lock for three days in a row to acquire, after waiting two years for such good fortune.
Maybe they were eaten by pigs, I forget, but I'm sure I don't know who might have put those pigs in the breakroom bathroom.
Since TPTB reassigned lockers by checking the assignment roster about every 7 years, no problem.
But in case the former owner returned, I had to act casual and profess ignorance. Both personal fortes of mine.
So if you're approached at change of shift in days to come by someone a little saggy, with one piece of bare bread, another piece covered with jelly, wondering where she left her clinical project, you know what to do.
If nonchalant ignorance fails, I can get you a deal on some hungry and only slightly used pigs.
haha, saggy and with one piece of bare bread! This is a stone-cold cupcake crowd so that would be hard to miss!
ReplyDeleteWhat? That was YOUR locker? Oh, my bad!