Friday, June 22, 2012

You Did NOT Just Say That

We sent out a woman several years younger than me for further testing.  Abdominal pain, nausea, fever.  She gave her stated weight as a conservative (I'd say overly generous) 375 at last weigh-in about 2 years ago.  I don't say this to be cruel or uncaring, but as a courtesy to the ambulance crew who was transporting; it would be uncool for them to drop people because they are unprepared with the right number of personnel.  Size does sometimes matter.  She was a very nice lady, and she was much more comfortable at the time of transfer thanks to minuscule doses of meds for pain and nausea.

The EMT/Paramedic crew took report, and agreed that an ACLS transport was unnecessary.  The paramedic was busy training a new guy anyway, so the ensuing conversation took place out of her earshot.  I wish it had taken place out of mine.

Male EMT to female EMT: "OK, do you want to drive or tech"
Female EMT: "It doesn't matter, whatever you want"
Male EMT: "Well, why don't you tech, since it is a female patient.  That way you can have the girl on girl action"

Dead silence (except for the sound of my head hitting the underside of the desk as I drove under it to muffle my laughter).

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