Monday, February 4, 2013

Reap This

Today I walked into a day-shift shit storm as they were transferring a successful (read: "alive") code enroute to higher level of care.  There were lots of people waiting, some of whom had been waiting quite a while.  There was a handful of nice respectful individuals who were aware that a life-death situation was occurring.  They were calmly and appropriately waiting their turns.

Then there was Angry Woman.  She had a cat scratch.  She had been waiting over an hour.  SHE WAS AT RISK FOR INFECTION and creating all kinds of ruckus to the point where my boss became involved as my co-workers labored to transfer the nearly expired patient.


Jane: "I made nice with her.  She is waiting for Parvati to see her.  And she wants her B12 shot, she usually gets that as an outpatient, she doesn't have an order for it soIcalledovertoeherprimarycareandI'mwaitingforafax", she finished rapidly, probably hoping I didn't hear it.

Me: "So, let me get this straight.  She has an emergent cat bite and came in for an emergent B12 shot for which she doesn't have an order and she has made a scene and threatened to leave if she doesn't get it in the next five minutes and you have placated her, is that correct?"

Jane: "Um, yes?"

Me: "OK, I lost interest in that 5 minutes ago.  I'm going to do EKG's and line and lab a syncope patient.  Have fun with the douchey Angry Woman".  I walked off to retrieve the IV bucket and EKG machine, but not before I asked Angry Woman to take her Loud Hallway Douchey Telephone Yelling Session With Her Primary Care Provider's Office out of my hallway and into a room.  Eventually she stalked out, but Jane had told Angry Woman that she would call when the order came in.

 I politely told Jane that if I was busy with ACTUAL EMERGENCY patients that I would not be calling the shrew.   It was not pertinent to emergency care.

About 20 minutes later Ellen brought me a fax referencing Angry Woman from her primary care that read: "Re: Vitamin B 12.  Angry Woman called from the ER and stated that she would leave if the order was not faxed in 5 minutes"


Me: "Um, that's not an order, Jane"

Jane: "Sure it is....isn't it?"

Me: "Jane.  No diagnosis, no dosage, no route.  Not signed.  Definitely not an order"

Jane: "Her primary care office said she was a mumblemumblemumble"

Me: "Excuse me?"

Jane: "They said she was a bitch difficult"

Me: "As ye sow, blah, blah blah"

Sometimes squeaky wheels just get the well-deserved shaft.