Tuesday, January 20, 2009

F stop

Why do people find it necessary to punctuate their discomfort with "fuck" to make a point? I am not averse to dropping an occasional "F" bomb to make a point.....when it's appropriate. But it is seriously overused if you ask me.

Can I say "fuck" on this blog? Guess I'll find out.

Perhaps in the ER we should institute an "F Scale".

I see this as an adjunct to quantifying pain via the pain scale.

Let's say a patient is complaining of back pain. He might say something like "Ah, FUCK. My fucking back hurts so fucking much, I just want to fucking kill myself. FUCK!

So, the pain is 10/10, with an F scale of 5. And a +1 for suicidal ideation as a bonus.

Another way to guage the turkey factor is F per minute.



This is just overkill. And insincere. I heard you the first 9 times you said it.

I used to work with a very funny doc. He was really an angry young man deep down, but pretty funny usually. In my opinion he had the best possible use of the F word. He frequently used used the expression: FYYFF.

Fuck You, You Fucking Fuck. Or more accurately:

Fuck YOU. You. Fucking. FUCK.
The last 3 words were sort of slow and enunciated, like 'You. dirty. rat".

I really appreciate the f bombardiers who pause after a string of f's to ask me how my shift is going. Ah, trying to endear yourself to me are you? Won't work, I can see ya coming a mile away.

My boss hung up an article written by someone whose defense against busy or compassion-lacking nurses was to get "up close and personal" with them, to try to connect with them in some way as to increase the human factor. One of her tactics was to ask if the nurse had children, or comment "I love your clogs!". Seasoned and hard core nurses won't fall for this; it just signals them that there is an agenda. It did get me thinking though. Anyone of us would advocate strenuously for a loved one, it just happens that those of us who work in health care (especially the ER) are usually more direct.

Hey Doc, great clogs!


Sunday, January 11, 2009

Some Vacation!

So I took a little time off. Well, a LOT of time off, can't believe it has been 3 months since I have neglected my blog. It totally amazes me that people still actually read my meandering scribblings. To those of you who have left comments, I apologize for never responding. Bad blogger that I am, I humbly beg forgiveness. I can assure you that I have not been idle.

As an aging BSN student I continue to plod along one course at a time. I can't say I actually enjoy it, but at least now I am over the hump and have more credits under my belt than the ones to come. I am CLEPping humanities next week so I can get credit for two electives, and plan to CLEP American government, college math, algebra, and chemistry. These latter three are not strong suits and will require tutoring probably. Although I did discover a web site, Aleks, which is sort of an online tutor for math and science. I have done a few math modules and have discovered that I'm not as math-illiterate as I have thought all these years. I found out that there are (gasp!) RULES for this stuff! Imagine that! I just never picked up on that in high school! Ha!

On the work front I have stopped doing the admission job. It was too stressful for a lot of reasons. Now, keep in mind that I have plenty of supervisory experience. I was a clinical leader in a very busy 35 bed ER, was a nurse coordinator for a bunch of school nurses, and I have been a charge nurse for most of my 32 years. Heck, my first job out of nursing school was a 3-11 charge nurse on a 40 bed rehab floor. Just me and my shiny new RN license, 1 LPN, and 4 LNA's. Talk about home alone! The point is I can handle pressure, but I digress; the admissions job was like fitting square pegs in round holes. Nobody wanted to take the admissions, the PACU needed to get people out, the ICU needed to get people out, the ER needed to get people out, Tele needed to transfer non-tele's off their unit, the floors were understaffed and overwhelmed, primary docs wanted patients directly admitted and it was pretty much a damned house of cards on most days because beds were scarce as hen's teeth.

So what have I been doing instead? I took a position at Scary Catholic Hospital where nobody yells at me. Yeah, I took a pay hit. Yeah, I have to work weekends and holidays. But it is a relatively stress-free existence. I will still work in the ER at Pseudocity, but I won't be doing much in the admissions line. I am rather liking my sanity.