ER tech was carefully mining for a vein in an old dude with multiple co-morbidities with shortness of breath. In CHF. Who refused to take his hat off.
Old Dude: (between gasps for breath) "I. Have. Really. Bad. ……Veins. Go. Ahead and. Slap it"
ER tech: (therapeutically conversational, but focused on the task and milking arm veins): "Well, I really just kind of think that massaging it seems to work better. I'm more of a stroker than a slapper"
Snerk.