Monday, July 9, 2012

...and it's only Monday

In this corner I have Wednesday.  She will do anything to get out of doing her job.  Won't call anyone in her own department to ask a question, "I don't know" seems to be her personal credo, can't seem to figure anything out on her own.  Is definitely more comfortable having someone else do it.  Is definitely not an out-of-box thinker, although I am beginning to suspect a dumb-like-a-fox mentality.  She is a sidler, too.  She sidles right up next to me.  If I am at a computer and typing madly (almost always a triage note or something patient related) Wednesday seems to think that is the perfect time to ask me about my weekend.  Or how much she likes my clogs.   She definitely bugs the shit out of me.  

She also bugs the shit out of Eeyore, the secretary, in the other corner.  Ye Gods, I don't think I have ever heard Eeyore  say one positive thing.  Ever.  And I thought I was the negative one. The interaction between Wednesday and Eeyore should, by all rights, be  kind of funny to watch if it wasn't so distracting, because then Eeyore complains to me.  Eeyore's method of not doing her job is simply to call in sick, but she does her job well when she is there most of the time.  Wednesday persists with her inane questions even if Eeyore is busy assisting other customers.

 Between the two of them I was ready to kill.  Instead, I wrote this:

"Ode to Wednesday", or, "Cereal?  Can you eat it like that, right out of the box?" 

I eat hot dogs with just mustard
How does one work a spoon?
Oh, look!  It's Haley's Comet!
Are there 30 days in June?

You must fax this, I made cupcakes,
Is this stapler out of date
Can you operate this toaster
Do hot-air balloons deflate?

Are you busy? Is that copper?
Have you ever played guitar
I like cheese but only cheddar
I once dropped a pickle jar

My boss is named Morticia
We be just like family
Although it would be more productive 
To hire a chimpanzee.