Shorts

Stinkiferous: describing lingering, sometimes noxious odor in a treatment room long after the individual(s) have departed.  Examples are hockey and football equipment and feet, soccer shin pads, and any patient who works at the local candle factory.

I have had enough of posters and sign up sheets for fund raisers.  FYI: I will not be doing any further collection of books, clothing, or winter camping gear that will then be distributed by the hospital for bragging rights for the wonderfulness of their humanitarian efforts.

Also,   I will not be running any charity 3K's or 5K's for any more causes unless it is for a definitive cure for stupid.

Gil: "It's going to be a six hammer night".  Reference: sometimes people need to be beaten with a hammer.  Please note that I am not talking about patients.

Wonderful World of Speech-to-Text Dictations in which Mac Does Not Proof-Read:

"The patient has recurrent tooth pain.  Her only problem be self once she has her teeth extracted.  However there does not appear to be readily feasible or likely to happen"

"UV strep test and flu tests were negatibe as likely to have the same upper respiratory infection however he is been sick now for about a week longer continue to uese the Zofran as necessary for nausea and robitussin with codeine 1 teaspoon every 6 hours as necessary for cough if in 5-7 days Asian R 20 better adn the cough persists started on Zithromaz as directed once daily follow up with your doctor in 7-19 days if not market lee better"

Asian R 20?  Market lee better?  7-19 days? WTF?